Garden of Hope-New York
紐約勵馨婦幼關懷中心
Exposed Children / Child Abuse 
家暴目睹兒 / 受虐兒
受虐兒
研究指出,夫妻之間有家暴問題,他們的孩子九成都曾經遭受某種形式的暴力。在家暴環境中的孩子同時是兒童虐待的高危險群。
  • 身體虐待:對兒童施以過當的管教或嚴重的體罰,導致兒童身體受傷、終身殘廢或死亡。
  • 精神虐待:對兒童毫不關心、刻意忽視、冷落、排斥或時常斥責、怒罵、挑剔、批評、恐嚇、輕視、過份要求等造成兒童在感情、心理、智力方面的發展受阻礙。
  • 疏忽照顧:沒有提供兒童充份的飲食、安全的住所、保暖的衣物及適當的衛生、醫療和教育;強迫兒童做過量、、無法負荷的工作或把兒童單獨留在家中。
  • 性虐待:對兒童進行性侵害,例如:強暴、猥褻、強迫其撫摸暴露身體私處,以達到成人的性滿足;或利用兒童拍攝色情照片(影片)使兒童受到身體及心理之傷害。
  • 遺棄:父母刻意拋棄或不負擔照顧養育之責任。

Definitions 
Abused Children
Studies have shown that nine out of ten children who were raised in homes with domestic violence faced abuse. Therefore, children are negatively affected and are at risk for child abuse when they are in an environment with domestic violence. 
  • Physical Abuse: When children are subjected to severe physical abuse, which may include corporal punishment or discipline, they may suffer severe physical injuries leading to permanent disability or even death.
  • Emotional Abuse: Children who experience deliberate neglect, ignoring, exclusion, excessive rebuking, ridiculing, extreme criticism, intimidation, and excessive demands begin to develop emotional, psychological, and intellectual problems.
  • Neglect: When children are not provided with sufficient food, secure shelter, warm clothing and proper sanitation, healthcare and education. Parents force children to do excessive work or leave children at home unattended.
  • Sexual Abuse: Sexual abuse of children includes rape, indecent assault and touching the private parts of the child’s exposed body in order to achieve adult sexual gratification. It also includes shooting pornographic images and/or movies oh children which harm their physical and psychological being.
  • Abandonment: Parents deliberately abandon the child because they can not bear the responsibility of having a child.

目睹暴力兒童
家庭暴力的受害者不僅僅只是婦女本身,還包括了目睹家暴的孩子們。目睹暴力發生的兒童常被隱藏在婚暴問題之下,成為「隱形受害人」。大多數人以為孩子沒有在現場看見暴力場景,就不算目睹家庭暴力。其實孩子很敏感,家庭關係緊張,父母經常爭吵、發生肢體衝突、母親情緒低落,孩子都知道,也必定會產生負面影響。

(一)什麼是目睹暴力兒童?
指直接遭受暴力、當場看見暴力發生、事後知情、看見暴力過後的凌亂家具或被害人傷勢看見等,直接獲間接與家庭暴力事件接觸之孩童。

(二)目睹暴力兒童,可能會出現下列的情形:
1.生理方面:易疲倦、頭痛、胃痛,抵抗力差、注意力不集中,厭食或暴食,無法保持整齊清潔。
2.情緒方面:對於暴力事件感到羞恥、自責、有罪惡感,小孩可能呈現外向或內向行為,內向行為包含怕生、恐懼、自責、沉默、哭泣等,外向行為包含攻擊他人、破壞物品等。
3.行為方面:可能會有尿床、吸允手指等退化行為或過度表現、討好,攻擊、破壞、自我傷害等行為。
4.長期影響:小孩可能會出現發展遲緩,以暴力解決問題或宣洩情緒,自我價值感低,社交功能低落,人際關係不佳。

(三)身為母親的妳,可以為孩子做什麼?
1.身為母親的妳有權將孩子帶離暴力環境,保護他們的人身安全。
2.孩子未成年時,妳有權替孩子申請保護令。
3.明確且重複的告訴孩子,這不是他的錯。
4.當孩子出現情緒或行為偏差徵兆時,妳可以尋求專業協助以平復創傷,例如至兒童心智科就診、遊戲治療等心理諮商。

(四)身為目睹暴力兒童週遭的老師及任何大人,你可以成為孩子穩定力量的來源,當孩童的家庭處在巨大風暴中時,他們在家庭以外,最多的時間就是待在學校中,每一位老師都可以提供適當的支持關懷與協助,成為孩子在這風暴中的船錨。

Exposed Children
Exposed children may display the following symptoms:
  • Physical: fatigue, headaches, stomachaches, poor immunity system, unable to focus, anorexia or binge eating, unable to remain clean and tidy
  • Emotional: Feeling humiliated, guilty or blaming oneself because of the violent incident. The child may take on behaviors of introverts or extroverts. The former includes a fear of strangers, panic, self-blame, silence, crying etc. The latter includes attacking others and destroying items etc.
  • Behavioral: regressive behavior may appear such as soiling the bed, sucking fingers etc. The child may try too hard to perform well or please others, attack others, destroy items, exhibit self-destructive behaviors, etc.
  •  Long-term effects: children may have developmental delays or use violence to solve problems or vent emotions. They may also have low self-esteem, poor social skills, and poor interpersonal relationships.

What can you do as a mother to help your child?

  • As the child’s mother, you have the right to take your child away from the violent environment and protect their safety.
  • Before the child becomes an adult, you have the right to file a petition for an Order of Protection for him/her.
  • When your child displays symptoms of deviant emotions or behaviors, you can seek professional assistance to help your child recover from trauma, for example, child behavioral health clinics and counseling, such as Play Therapy.
  • For teachers and adults that are part of exposed children’s everyday life: you can become a stabilizing force to them. When children are in the midst of the huge storm stirred up by their family, most of their time will be spent at school, besides at home. Every teacher can provide appropriate support, care and assistance, and become the child’s anchor in this storm.

Resources資源連結

兒童福利局 http://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/preventionmonth

幫助兒童協會 http://www.childhelp.org/pages/statistics

國家兒童創傷網 http://www.nctsnet.org/resources

國家性侵害資源中心 http://www.nsvrc.org/saam